W A I T I N G

Alright. I have something else to say.

Sometimes I love waiting.

I love waiting for the sun to set.

I love waiting to eat avocados until they're almost too ripe.

I love waiting til after midnight to fall asleep.

I love waiting to wake up til my alarm goes off.

It's time to share the confusion in my head.

Isn't TIME such an interesting thing?

Time fascinates me.

Sometimes time goes by super fast.
Sometimes it goes by reallyyyyyyyy slowwwww.

My mission president taught me the value of time.
He explained that we should never use the term "killing time" because time really is so precious.  

When my life feels like its moving in slow motion I often sit around wishing it would speed up instead of enjoy what Heavenly Father is trying to teach me in this time of my life.  I need to work on that.

I got home from my mission 12 weeks ago today.  Wow.  

I'm not gonna lie, I've struggled a LOT with time these past several weeks.  

I'll spare you of all the details, but I will say that I feel like its now time to really focus on moving forward in my life.  Its time to figure out what I want to do, where I want to be and how I'm going to get here.  

It is most definitely an adventure.  

I am trying to trust in Heavenly Father's timing.  Just about every day He's kind enough to remind me that He controls the clock.  

I'm thankful for that. 

 If I follow His plan, He can do so much more with the time than I could even begin to imagine. 

:)

Ughhh.

I hate when I just NEED things.

I just NEED them.

...I especially hate when my bank account doesn't think that I need them.

You see, just after I got my mission call my Bishop told me that Satan would place a big, fat target on my back. He explained that he would be trying to tempt me in whatever way he could.

...I had no idea that these temptations would come in the form of boots from Charlotte Russe.

I'm weak.

I bought them.

I HAD to.

Will I be taking them on my mission? Nope.

Will they even be in style when I get back? Perhaps no.

Did my bank account need them? Definitely not.

They do bring a huge smile to my face though.

:))))

Temporary pleasure.

Ughhhh.

I knit, I cruise

Oh man.

So I've been knitting a whole lot lately ... and I'm just not sure if its healthy.

I've had SO many thoughts and decisions on my mind lately and knitting is such a mindless activity that I find myself getting deeply consumed in my thoughts.


I officially STINK at making decisions. Really. I always have struggled with such things. Even unimportant, little decisions basically throw me into panic attacks.


Example: (this happened this past summer)


Me (10:30pm): Dad, should I go to Jana's?! She wants me to go over there and I want to go but I also have work tomorrow (swim school). What should I do?
Dad (tired of me asking him what I should do): Jennika, pretty soon you're going to be SHOULD-ING all over yourself.
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA.


Shocked. If any of you know my Dad, you would be shocked too. It was hilarious. But he definitely proved a point to me... and that is, I STINK AT MAKING DECISIONS. So if I struggle with such little decisions, you could probably imagine how much I'm struggling with the biggest decision I've ever had to make in my life (so far).


Life is hard. Making choices is real scary.

Which road do I take?!

Do you ever SHOULD all over yourself?






I'll soon be sailing the Carnival Destiny to this lovely place...







and i.cannot.wait!


Hopefully it will help me figure out what to do with my life.



I almost wish I was a Professional Student sometimes. That would make my life sooooo much easier right now!

I simply have a simple mind. I laugh at things most people don't laugh at. I smile about things most people overlook. I can have the best slash funniest day of my life all because of simple thoughts I had during my day.

Is that weird?